Times have changed, and most geographical evolution, I'm out of hiding.
Can you imagine how difficult it is for me? Before you had your arms, your chest and back, to blend with your skin and hide my sorrows with the nerve that always characterized me. Today is not an option, I have to leave everything in the open, that my current partner decide what to do with it ... I know he hates me not naked.
Like when my mother forbade me to shut the door leaving the room because I knew that there alone was capable of committing a crime against my own feelings and my mental health.
I must admit that they did so with good intentions. I must also say that I would do the same, I love the same way ... the problemis more difficult that becomes, ironically, it becomes easier.
've noticed I'm confused ...
If I'm honest, I think I'm going crazy.
live in the unrest, with butterflies, singing all the time, dreaming, wishing, wanting.
I think this already happened to me before. I'm pretty sure it was what led us to commit many follies while we were together.
was sick that need to contemplate for hours these absurd to predict both the irreverent taste by holding hands and kissing the mouth.
am able to identify the feeling, but I can not believe he is feeling, on a par with much fear. I always thought that room
lar of love and fear was like talking oil and water ... However, I agree that the mixture makes it much more intense. And that I had not ever felt.
He is also afraid.
It's just an inexperienced and innocent child. As clear as the morning light, and as cold as the wind itself of these winters.
not usually speak, but I know he loves me ... the problem is I do not know how much, and some is not enough ... little is killing me. There
problems begin.
I wonder every day if it involves the anxiety, if you feel the butterflies flutter when I see it, if he sings, whether you dream, if you feel the desire and craving arrives.
Sometimes I notice it in his eyes, like a mysterious flash that fills me with alefeel that way. Panics located in a dream, because we usually open our eyes and fall in mind that once again we must forget the joy and peace.
Tell me ... Is that love? ...
So feel? ...
Because if so, I must inform you that my decision is as follows:
Just today, I will go to the bottom of my heart so damaged, I'll get on your knees and ask forgiveness for not believe possible before. And not to open my arms now I have it in front.
Sorry I can not keep writing, but I know your answer ...
And you know what I have to do.
to ever want to forget.
With respect,
Cristina.
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